IN WHICH SHE SEES THAT THINGS SOMETIMES JUST GO WRONG

How are we meant to respond as a slave/submissive/babygirl type when we're asked to do something and we know it's the wrong thing to be doing?

I'm not talking about the "I want you to take this gun and shoot that person" scenario that is so often the rhetoric of those who are opposed to (or who don't understand..) the ideas behind TPE.  I'm thinking about a real situation when you have been told to do something that is going to have negative consequences for not only yourself, but for your master and for the relationship between the two of you.

I used to think that I knew the answer to this question - I mean, it was easy... the relationship dynamic is based on trust and surrender on the part of the slave.  This means that even though I might not be able to see the reasoning behind a decision, I have to know that my master has the goal in mind and I have to follow.

I just have to have faith and surrender.

What I didn't really consider is that there might be times when he simply makes a poor decision about how to get to that goal, and as a consequence of that decision things fall apart.

How should I behave when I can see what the result of a decision is going to be, and I can see that its going to be bad?

I think that until now I only knew half of the answer.  Yes - this dynamic is about trust and surrender... but the aspect that I was missing is that it is also about the acceptance of consequences.

So, I have faith and I surrender.

And when things fall apart because I have obeyed his will, which is the good, right and true thing for a slave to do, I will accept the consequences of my obedience.

Sometimes the consequences are hearing the words "good girl."  And sometimes the consequences are that things just fall apart.

If things break, it doesn't necessarily mean that I failed.. sometimes things just break.

IN WHICH SHE TALKS ABOUT HER FEAR OF SUBMITTING

I'm an extremely self-disciplined person.  I've had to be.  Not only have I developed this self-discipline as a means to prepare myself to serve, but it's been a resource that I've been able to rely on to keep me sane and focused during the long long time since I've had a daddy.

Now I find myself in a strange position where the thought of surrendering that control really is quite terrifying.

If I hand over my hard won self-control to a dominant, then everything about me could fall to pieces in a heartbeat, meaning that I would no longer have the ability to serve.  If I didn't have the ability to serve my dominant, then not only have I failed in what I'm trying to do for him, but I wouldn't be useful at all.  If I don't have a purpose and I can't serve and be useful, then why would my dominant want to own me?  And if my dominant didn't want to own me, then that leaves me in a precarious position where I have no control over myself because I've surrendered it, and no dominant to lend me focus and structure, to give me purpose, to find me useful.  It would leave me having given up control over myself, looking to where he is standing for some sort of focus and finding that he has left.

So, I suppose the question stands... how do you surrender all control to someone without falling apart?

IN WHICH SHE DISCUSSES SOME MYTHS ABOUT BEING A BABYGIRL

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IN WHICH SHE TALKS ABOUT REMEMBERING HER PLACE

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